The Return
by horseyyay
Summary: Sauron returns about 10,000 years after the War of The Ring, He's now in the 21st century and is trapped in a 16 year old's body and confined to the grounds of a school. Nothing is sacred and the world is about to be turned upside down. AU
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: We own a bunch of random ideas and put several characters who aren't ours into this :P**

**A/N: Hi! Welcome to The Return :) I was originally intending to wait to finish my other fics before writing this but a certain co writer has bugging me all summer and I finally caved :) therefore I now have 4 fics on the go and updates will be sporadic :P **

**PLEASE NOTE! My fellow writers and I are perfectly aware that this is pure fantasy. None of this would ever happen and if it did I would be seriously worried about the fate of the universe. Events in this story may or may not have been the result of one track mindedness. :P Any similarities between people and places you may know is completely coincidental. Please feel welcome to exchange people in this story for similar people that you know. This fic is mainly for fun so flames will be COMPLETELY ignored because i don't really give a damn... ****:P concrit is appreciated though :) **

**LET THE MADNESS BEGIN!**

_**Chapter 1 - Introductions**_

When Sauron woke up he immediately knew a few things.

1. He had been AWOL for roughly ten thousand years.

2. Elves, dwarves and anything remotely non-human was completely forgotten. Well... mainly forgotten.

3. He was woken up by a rocking chair.

Now this wasn't any old rocking chair. It was a rocking chair which eternally rocked. It was also inhabited by the spirit of a dead nun. Now you might be wondering why a rocking chair woke up a guy, everyone thought was dead and gone or didn't believe existed. The simple truth is... It was destroyed. The eternal rocking disturbed people. It wasn't their fault that they didn't realise that destroying the chair would release The Dark Lord Sauron.

This chain of events was put into place roughly 500 years ago when a French peasant found 10 glowing balls in the ground. Naturally, he took it to the local church. They lived there for the next 400 years until a bunch of nuns took over.

The nuns decided that it would be best if these 10 glowing balls were split up. Who knew, they could be dangerous and explode at any time. So they packed up their belongings and left France, disappearing to all 4 corners of the world.

Three nuns took the glowing ball that was actually Sauron to England. More specifically, to the town of Kidderminster. There they validated their presence by building a school for girls, Holy Trinity School. The glowing ball was hidden in a small room up a spiral staircase in the middle school. And at all times one of the nuns sat in the rocking chair, watching.

These nuns were very peculiar nuns for they actually knew 'witchcraft'. They enchanted the glowing orb and for some unknown reason decided that it was to be contained in the rocking chair.

100 years later, the nuns were dead and gone, lots of people were freaked out by the chair (lots of people had fallen down the stairs in terror), and it really had no apparent use.

The chair was destroyed and Sauron released.

* * *

The first thing Sauron saw was an extremely dusty store room. He took one step forwards and promptly fell down the stairs. He even managed to go through the door at the bottom. He emerged into a large, brightly lit room.

It had stupidly high ceilings and weird semicircles on the floor in different colours. He didn't know it but he was in the school gym. The light hurt his eyes so he quickly exited through a pair of double doors into an abandoned hallway.

He walked down the hallway and ducked into the first door he saw. He really didn't ant to be seen by anyone.

Sauron wasn't really with it at that moment. I mean who would be after being in the equivalent a ten thousand year long coma.

That's why it took him a really long time to process what he was seeing when he came face to face with himself in a mirror. First he hid, as he thought someone was behind him. When he saw the foe was gone he screamed angry insults at this deadly enemy. Then he stood up. The enemy had returned. He ducked and the enemy disapeared again. It took a few repetitions for him to realise that he was, in fact, looking at himself.

When this fact hit him, as the fog cleared in his brain, he stared at his reflection in horror. He touched every part of his face and body in disgust. For our favourite Dark Lord was currently in the form of a 16 yr old boy. A really, really attractive one.

He didn't know that last bit though. He was too focused on the teenage boy part. It took him many hours to stop looking at his reflection and with all that screaming earlier it was a wonder no one had walked in on him. Apart from the fact that it was the school holidays so no one was around. Convenient right. You would almost say it was destiny.

Once Sauron had finally got over himself, he decided to go outside. He walked across the abandoned carpark and towards the front gate. The front gates were not locked, under the basis that they never were. Someone had probably lost the key.

So he marched out of the front gate. And collapsed on the floor. Black spots swam in front of his eyes and he suddenly couldn't breathe.

* * *

While Sauron lay on the pavement trying to claw his way back onto the school grounds before he asphyxiated, three fifteen year old girls were having a waterfight. As it was they happened to be just down the road from Sauron but that isn't all that important.

The three were best friends of course, and were all on the nerdier side of life. They all had some sort of obsession with the Lord Of The Rings, whether it was the films, the books, or both. They also had obsessions with several other fantasy books as well.

All three have hair of varying shades of brown, one is tall and tanned with blue eyes. This is Jenny, awesome at science, running, high jump... basically all sports. With the exception being netball.

The second is Alexa, maths geek of the century, who also plays the violin and the piano and detests all sport, although she's fairly good at it.

And last and definitely least, height wise anyway, is Emma. Good at most things (barring French), awesome at drawing and most definitely a danger in all sport.

They also all go to Holy Trinity School. Soon their lives will be turned upside down and nothing will be the same again.

**A/N: Hope you all enjoyed :) updates will be whenever, chapters will get longer and pls review! **

**P.S sorry for the weird writing style... most other chapters won't be like that :P**


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: HI! thx to all who reviewed :) :) here is chapter 2 :) sorry it took a while... life has been rather whirlwindy recently :P **

**And just to clarify as I'm sure there would be questions about this. The school this is set in is mainly a girls school (based on the school I used to go to) because I thought it would be fun. Kinda hard to explain but it recently became a mixed school and therefore although boys are allowed, there aren't boys from year 11 up many because of when it became mixed :P as I said, based on my own to seriously help me with character creation :P**

**In reply to the Guest who reviewed: There is nothing wrong with that reaction :) I hope you keep on reading :)**

**Chapter 2 **

The day Sauron had spent all summer preparing for was finally here. The first day of school. He had spent most of the summer manipulating people's minds. As a result he now had lots of clothes, a school uniform, a nice smartphone and a vague idea of how he should act.

He also knew what his 'name' was and he had even decided what year to go into. Yr 11. A year in which everyone was so caught up in their studies that they wouldn't pay attention to the new boy. And the work wasn't all that challenging for an all-knowing god thing. Plus they had a common room without a TV which was permanently stuck on channel 4 music. He found pop music... irritating to say the least.

He had also spent a very long time deciding what subjects he should do, aside from the compulsory. He had felt drawn to French so that was his language option, PE because, well, how hard could running around be, and finally ICT because computers and technology were definitely a weak point.

* * *

_**Year 11**_

Everyone was sitting on the desks enjoying the general camaraderie of the first day back as territory was staked, new alliances formed and enemies made. This was normal and continued for quite some time until the Year 11 form tutors, Madame Beverly (French teacher, oh joy) and Mrs Fryman (slightly OCD Maths teacher) walked in.

There was mass confusion for a while as everyone all chose their seats in strategic positions. Then long boring lectures on rules that were never enforced and guides on how to use the yearly planner followed.

Halfway through the droning lectures which everyone knew and really thought were a waste of time, there was a slight knock on the door.

"Come in!" Madame Beverly cheerfully announced. She knew someone was missing. She also knew that it was a guy and things could get rather interesting. After all, this is a class full of girls.

Everyone turned to watch as the hottest guy they had ever seen walked into the room. The definition of tall, dark and handsome, although most would have just used the term hot. He had jet black hair and golden-brown eyes.

Half the class started mentally drooling. The remaining half were literally drooling.

* * *

Sauron didn't really process the consequences of being the only guy in a class of girls until he actually walked into one. Several of them began drooling at the sight of him, little globs of spit rolling down their chins.

Then the subtle fidgeting began. Shapeless jumpers were straightened, hair was ruffled and twirled, regulation knee length skirts became un-regulation thigh length. Not that he actually reacted to that, it was just an observation.

Then the simpering smiles began and twittery voices rang "Hi sit next to me." He didn't. He slunk to an unoccupied desk at the back.

"Oh hello, you must be Annatar Fair" Madame Beverly announced cheerily. Mrs Fryman just stared with a peculiar look on her face.

"Yes." His voice echoed around the room which had suddenly gone silent. "Sorry I'm late."

Although he appeared normal and calm to the class (not that they would have known what not normal was) inside he was a tinsy bit worried. He couldn't get himself excluded, it would be rather hard to explain why he practically dropped down dead when he tried to leave the school grounds.

Luckily for Jenny, Alexa and Emma (remember them?) Sauron was sitting just a desk away, which was a perfect distance to ogle him at. And speculate about his name.

"Do you think his parents just have a really twisted sense of humour?" whispered Emma.

"It's pretty twisted to name your kid after Sauron." replied Alexa.

"What? I'm confused!" Unlike Emma and Alexa, Jenny preferred to ogle Aragorn than read the Silmarillion. Not that they didn't like ogling Aragorn, they just also like reading long, confusing books with tiny writing.

"Sauron once took the form of an elf so he could trick people into making the rings. He was know as Annatar the Fair. Basically."

"His parents are totally twisted and evil!" Jenny exclaimed, slightly louder than she should have. Quite a few heads turned her way. Thankfully the teachers didn't hear. Or just ignored them.

"Maybe he is Sauron!" Emma had an evil grin on her face.

"No! Bad Emma. You may be an evil demon but he's a perfectly nice, normal person who you can't accuse of being Sauron!"

"How do you know he's normal? Is there something you're not telling us Jen?" Alexa added her evil grin to Emma's increasingly evil one.

"NO! Shut up!"

"Just kidding Jen... we know you would tell us if you had!" Jenny glared at their evil faces.

"It would be kinda cool if he was Sauron..."

"No... It wouldn't!" Alexa and Jenny were utterly horrified. "How would it be cool!"

"Sauron's powerful! And he's... interesting!"

Someone cleared their throat loudly and the three of them turned to the front of the class guiltily. Madame Beverly was glaring at them.

"Sorry." They all stared at their desks.

"Would you like to share." The unspoken words were, I'm bored with this talk, so are you, lets see if you were saying anything interesting that I can relate to.

"Ummm... I was just saying how Sauron was an interesting character..." Emma's voice was very tiny.

Madame Beverly's expression asked her question for her.

"Well... ummm I noticed how Annatar Fair is very similar to Annatar The Fair which was what Sauron was known by occasionally..." Her voice faded to nothingness at the blank, glazed looks every one was giving her. She shut up and stared at her desk.

Madame Beverly blinked several times then launched straight back into the yearly planner. "Now, please do not deface these as we do have to show examples at parents evenings..."

Emma kept quiet and began to doodle on the planner. It was a good thing she didn't look sideways. Annatar was giving her a very strange look.

* * *

As Annatar became acquainted with the ways of the planner, Emma doodled on the planner, and everyone else slowly drifted into a coma, the inhabitants of Valinor were impersonating headless chickens. Or people with their hair set on fire.

At the moment Madame Beverly announced Annatar's presence in the room, Valinor had been in panic mode. The remote possibility that it might be Sauron had them planning invasion forces.

But first they would scout and assess the situation. So the began the training of the ideal elf. The wrong elf would be disastrous. After all, Sauron might be returning to prey on a helpless, innocent world.

**A/N: Hope you enjoyed, now before I go to sleep I just want to leave you with the wonderful image of a hippie legolas in a tie-dyed top and bright green flares :P :P (no hippie legolas does not star in this fic, he's just too awesome)**


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer: I don't own characters you recognise :P I own other things along with my co-workers**

**A/N: This has got to be my quickest update ever :P thx to **Qeani, MapleLeafy, Violin, ThurinRanger and Yuki **who reviewed :) *hugs* for all the people who support hot Sauron :P Oh and say Hi to our favourite elf prince :P **

**Chapter 3**

**Somewhere in Dorset **

Legolas stared at the huge and slightly tired looking house which the last remaining descendant of Aragorn lived. He had spent a week preparing for this moment. A week. A week spent preparing to destroy Sauron. The Valar had great faith in his abilities...

He sighed and knocked on the door. A rather haggard looking woman opened it and allowed him into a kitchen area.

"You're the one who rang earlier. Zachary's brother." It wasn't a question. It was a statement. She ignored his long blonde hair.

"Yes, I am." He politely replied.

"Go and find him then. I have things to do." The woman then walked off and Legolas turned to the other occupants of the room.

"Hi I'm looking for Zachary."

A multitude of kids stared at him. "He's upstairs." One of them volunteered through a mouthful of ketchup.

"Where?"

"I'll show you." A young kid with chips sticking out of his mouth ran off and Legolas quickly followed. As they reached the top of the stairs the kid pointed to a door at the far end of the hall. "That's his." Then he bolted back down the stairs.

Legolas knocked on the door before entering. He was utterly shocked by the resemblance to the original aragorn this kid had. He also felt a sinking feeling. He couldn't be more than sixteen.

"Hi. I'm Legolas and I'm taking you to kill Sauron." As soon as it came out of his mouth Legolas realised that might not have been the best thing to say.

There was a moment of awkward silence before the teen burst out laughing.

"You have got to be kidding me. Although that wig is pretty cool!" His almond-shaped brown eyes gleamed mischievously.

"It is not a wig!" Legolas fumed.

"How else do you get long blonde hair!"

"You grow it!" This was not a good start. Zach decided to let the subject drop.

"How did you get in here? They don't normally let randomers in."

"I told them I was your brother." No point in lying to him.

Zachary collapsed into laughter again. "The family resemblance is so strong!"

"Do you want to get out of here?" Legolas got straight to the point. If Sauron was back, he couldn't waste time sitting here talking about hair with a teenage boy.

"And go where?"

"To kill Sauron!" Legolas handed Zach the file with all Annatar's details in it.

He studied it for a minute "So you're taking me to kill a kid who's parents were extremely vindictive with a warped sense of humour because you think he might be Sauron?"

"He is Sauron, but yes!"

"Do I get my own room with no other kids in sight?"

"Yes."

Zach jumped off the bed. "I'm in, when do we leave! I don't care that you are insane and believe you are someone from The Lord Of The Rings!" His eyes shone with happiness.

Legolas chose to ignore the last half of his comment. "Good. Now grab the sword and lets go."

"Sword?"

"Anduril? You dont have it?" Legolas began to experience a sinking feeling in his heart.

"I don't own anything apart from what you see in this room... "

"We need to find some other way of killing him then." Legolas tried not to be to disappointed.

"I hear guns are rather good at killing people."

"Guns? What are guns?"

"Get me out of here and I will tell you."

* * *

**_Holy Trinity School_**

Annatar was settling into his daily routine. He walked in every morning, got stared at by girls. Then went to his lessons. Today was going to be a fairly interesting one. He had decide what four sports he wanted to do for his GCSE PE.

At 9am the PE group lined up outside the PE room. There were seven of them. Mrs Thomas eventually bumbled up the stairs to unlock the room and let them in. "I'm sorry... the Year 8's keep stealing things..."

Once they were settled the sport selection began.

"You have to do four sports. You will all do Trekking because its an easy one to get full marks in."

"Trekking?" Annatar wasn't familiar with the term.

"You get into groups and navigate the countryside. Time-consuming but we always get full marks for it. You have to do 5 nights camping and 5 days walking in total. You can use your Duke of Edinburgh walks." Annatar nodded. Walking and camping. That was something he had done before.

"Mary, Arabella, Sian and Emma, you will all do Netball." Emma groaned inwardly. Netball was not her favourite sport.

"You will all do the training for Fitness even if you aren't doing it as a sport because it is beneficial for all your other sports. Everyone will do Personal Survival..."

"What's Personal Survival?"

"You are full of questions today... What's your name?"

"Annatar."

"Oh yes, I remember now. Its a course of how to survive in the water. You have to do it fully clothed. I recommend a long-sleeved T-shirt and leggings or similar. As I was saying everyone will do Personal Survival apart from Emma as you refuse to get in the swimming pool..."

"I want to do Personal Survival!" Emma protested.

"Emma. You have refused to get in the swimming pool for the last 3 years." Mrs Thomas never let her forget that fact.

"It might be a good idea to know how to survive if I accidentally fall in a lake." Mrs Thomas stared in shock.

The real reason was Annatar. She wasn't going to miss an opportunity to see him topless. It wouldn't be hard to spy on him in the changing rooms. Plus wet, clinging clothes weren't going to leave much to the imagination. And if she had to get in the swimming pool... it was just a sacrifice she would have to make.

Poor Annatar hadn't worked that out though. He was as confused as Mrs Thomas.

Mrs Thomas then droned on about what other sports they could do. They eventually finalised it with all seven of the group doing Trekking and Personal Survival, Emma had to do netball with Mary (annoying posh dancer) Arabella (blonde bitch) and Sian (super tall, tanned blonde, sporty person). Her fourth sport was Horse-Riding.

Annatar ended up doing Swimming with Bianca (bitch extrordanaire) and Abby (the minion) as well as Fitness. Emma managed to bag the coveted position of filming the swimmers. Topless Annatar coming up.

* * *

_**Several weeks later**_

"Legolas, remember, you are officially called Lucas Green, you got hit by a lorry and were in a coma for two years which is why you are in Year 11 not 6th form! Your ears are a genetic mutation. And stop mourning your hair!" Legolas kept stroking his newly shortened hair with a depressed look on his face.

Zach was enjoying himself immensely giving a famed elven warrior a lecture. He had finally decided that Legolas might be who he claimed to be although he wasn't convinced about Sauron yet.

They were about to infiltrate the school. Legolas was wearing a school uniform. Modified for all his knives, of course. Zach had managed to convince him not to take his bow into school.

Their entrance was pretty a much a repeat of when Annatar arrived. Only Legolas and Zach weren't quite so oblivious. The girls still hadn't got the drooling under control.

Zach quite enjoyed watching the process of female preening.

The pair quickly spotted Annatar, with him being the only other guy in the class and once they had been welcomed into the class they made a beeline for the other unoccupied desks at the back.

Zach chose them because there was no way he was sitting at the front. Legolas chose them so he didn't have to worry about being attacked from behind.

* * *

"OMG Legolas and a young Aragorn just walked in!" Alexa nearly exploded.

"Haha very funny!" Emma replied sarcastically. They were still teasing her about Annatar being Sauron.

"No seriously, they are!"

"Jenny, not you too."

"Girls! And Annatar! We have some transfers from St John's in Dorset. This is Zachary and Lucas!" Madame Beverly announced.

Emma looked up as Zach said "Hi, everyone!"

"Oh shit, it is Legolas and a young Aragorn!"

Jenny meanwhile was having a heart attack. "He looks like Aragorn, is called Zachary and has the voice of Benedict Cumberbatch!"

"Your dream boyfriend!" Alexa smiled sweetly.

"Let the merciless teasing commence!" Emma grinned evilly. "You know this means that there is a high chance of me being right about Annatar!"

"Emma, that's not a good thing." Jenny glared at her disapprovingly.

Emma just grinned and glanced at Annatar.

"I think that there are one too many coincidences!"

**A/N: For my friend Jenny I made an OC called Zachary (whoop whoop Green Rider) who looks like Aragorn and has the voice of Benedict Cumberbatch. :) Cus you're so awesome Jen :) violin doesn't get any presents yet :) A little less comedy this time but some filler and plot progression was needed :P comedy relief next chapter :P Pls note that we are imagining legolas as he was in LOTR not the hobbit :)**


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: HI! :) thx to **Queani, ThurinRanger, violin and Gollum Girl** for reviewing :) If I don't get round to replying to you before I update I will reply in the chapter :)**

**So here we go**

**ThurinRanger: Oh yes :) I'm having great fun with this. I am totally going to take advantage of all three of them :) Because I'm the author and therefore I can :P**

**Gollum Girl: Oh yes :) Leggy's in it :) who else would I put in :P**

**Queani: I love Zach too... although if Jenny heard that she'd probably kill me :P Anduril's gone for a little walkabout :) :) It might turn up at some point :)**

**Chapter 4**

Annatar cornered the trio after lunch. It was time for some allies. They were also the only ones who suspected... his real identity. He just hoped he could trust them. He needed allies right about now.

"Can I talk to you. Somewhere where we won't be overheard?"

They all stared at him and nodded mutely. It was a good thing he couldn't hear what was going through their heads. It was a strange mixture of 'his voice is sexy' 'I hope he's not an axe-wielding murderer' and 'he sounds like Scar from The Lion King'.

"Maybe the concert hall." The middling height one eventually croaked out.

"Remind me of your names. I'm not good at remembering them." He felt weird. At one point he wouldn't have cared about names... he was thinking more like an actual teenager every day.

"Jenny, Alexa, Emma." Emma said, pointing at each of them in turn.

They walked the rest of the way to the concert hall in an awkward silence. This was Sauron and three socially awkward people. Conversation wasn't high on their skills list.

Once they were there, Annatar turned to face them. "I have something to tell you. Please don't run, scream or tell anyone."

"I don't like where this is going" muttered Alexa. Jenny looked terrified.

"My real name is Sauron and..."

"HAH! IN YOUR FACE!" Emma crowed triumphantly. "I TOLD YOU!"

Alexa and Jenny looked like they were about to have a meltdown. "Oh fuck!"

"This is brilliant!" Emma was ecstatic.

"How? Emma, please explain how this is brilliant."

"Its Sauron, and he's HOT. Like mega hot!" She giggled evilly. "Its amazing! And its Sauron. Actually Sauron. Standing here." She began to jump up and down excitedly.

"Not good. Really not good!" Alexa was terrified and pissed. Jenny was just terrified.

"What's wrong?" Annatar was a little confused.

Alexa turned to him. "You just confessed to being an evil git who is meant to be part of a story and dead. Thats a problem."

"You do know if he's Sauron, then Lucas is Legolas and Zachary is a descendant of Aragorn!" Emma butted in.

Alexa and Jenny brightened up at that.

"But on the downside they are probably here to kill Sauron."

"Is that a bad thing?" Jenny muttered under her breath.

"Dying isn't on my to do list. Its rather unpleasant."

"You're evil. Since when did your opinion count." Jen shot back.

"Since he became hot. And 16."

"Emma shut up. Your affinity for all things evil is clouding your judgement."

"Now what do we do?" They stood in silence for a while.

"I vote become his friend so we can piss Ari and Bianca off!"

"Emma, you've already passed to the dark side. That question was not addressed to you." Emma didn't even try to pretend to look hurt. She looked triumphant instead.

"What did you mean earlier... when you said I was part of a story." That little fact was bothering him a tad.

"We know Sauron as the evil flaming eyeball who tried to take over Middle Earth. Part of an epic bunch of books known as The Lord Of the Rings and The History Of Middle Earth."

"Oh. That. Any idea what happened after I 'died'?"

No. You died. The End. That's why its hard to believe that you're alive. Plus you aren't torturing people or raising an army of orcs."

"Why would I do that?!"

"You're Sauron. That's what you do." Alexa shrugged. She seemed to have forgotten that she was talking to Sauron.

"But that would be completely counterproductive to fitting in and trying to find a way off the school grounds!"

"You can just walk out of the gate."

"Last time I did that I choked and nearly died. Again."

Jenny laughed.

"Not funny! Its tragic."

"Emma! Stop defending him and looking at him like he's a lost puppy!"

Silence filled the room. Before Annatar could enquire about lost puppies Alexa said. "We still haven't decided what to do." Alexa pointed out. "Jenny, make a decision. In or not in."

"But we will be enemies with Zach... and Legolas!"

"We can convert them to the Dark Side!"

"Another brilliant suggestion from the pit of insanity which is Emma." Alexa's voice oozed sarcasm.

Annatar looked from one girl to the next, struggling to understand what was going on. He was definitely becoming less and less Dark Lord like with every moment.

"Jenny, Alexa. Make your choice. This is the point of no return."

Emma became the subject of simultaneous death glares.

Alexa sighed. "In. It might be fun? But mission one. We are so converting Legolas!"

"An evil Legolas! Mwahahaha!"

"No. Emma. Just no."

Jenny looked at them both. "OK. But its your fault if we die. And Zach hates me. And we convert him."

Emma began to laugh excitedly. "BEST DAY EVER!".

"EMMA! NO! BEST DAY EVER IS NOT DEFINED BY BEFRIENDING THE FLAMING EYEBALL OF DOOM!"

* * *

_**The Void**_

He stirred in the darkness. It was time. Time for a new age to begin.

Evil was waking.

**A/N: Remembering to post the chapter would be useful... :) hopefully the conversation wasn't too confusing. I put names in when I thought they were needed :P And we are going to have another new, evil companion soon. I just need to do some lore research :P **


End file.
